gag gifts and pranks

COVER SOUND 

Fun
and games

Razz
pranks and tricks

Stuff
fun gag gifts

Call in Sick
Excuses
Insult Machine
Eye Test
The Mirror

Portrait Studio
Hard Drive Cleaner

Barking Spiders
Bad Printer Paper
Yes Mans Answers
Error Msg Decoder
Ask Nostradamus  

Free Stuff
Stupid Stuff
Gag Gifts-Pranks
Palm PDA Apps

Games
Fun Links

Todays Headlines
News Archives

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck
if a woodchuck could chuck wood?woodchuck

The answer to this age old question has perplexed people for eons.

Part of the reason the question is so difficult to answer is that the amount of wood that woodchucks would chuck on a given day varies greatly with the seasons and with the metabolisms of any individual woodchuck.

Modern internet technology has advanced to the point that we can reliably monitor the amount a woodchuck chucks in real time.

The results of this monitoring are shown below.  Please note that the numbers vary due to the dispositions of the woodchucks involved.

Attention: Woodchucks don't chuck unless you use Microsoft Internet Explorer as your browser.... Netscape scares them.

Average amount of wood a woodchuck would chuck in a given day
 butt cords of wood.

Median amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck in a given hour
 butt cords of wood.

Record high for woodchuck wood chucking of  butt cords
was attained on .

(NOTE: the above tabulations take into account that woodchuks chuck no wood on
February second, in observance of ground hog day.)

rubber duckland

Woodchuck Good Luck Charms

Research has shown that woodchuck chucking volume increases in proportion to worldwide use of Naughty Ned or Messie Bessie keychains.

Naughty Ned the pig, and Messie Bessie, the cow, are the keychains with an attitude.  Give them a gentle squeeze and they'll offer you a present.

Do your part in the promotion of woodchuck chucking by purchasing the Messie Bessie and Naughty Ned keychain pair today!  We have a special offer for woodchuck lovers.

CLICK HERE for the woodchuck lovers special offer.

Naughty Ned
Pig with attitude.

Messie Bessie
Cow pie chef extraordinaire.

Ned & Bessie owners:
Does your keychain need a FECALECTOMY?

 

HOME : FUN : RAZZ : STUFF : E-MAIL : TEXT

 

Please note:
The GetOdd website contains satire and parody,
which means that you should NOT take as truth many items featured here.
GetOdd is meant to be humorous and not necessarily factual.
Please see our
POLICY page for more information.   (C) 2001 GetOdd