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The Stress Page
"With stress, the biggest thing to fear is stress itself!" -- Frankie
"The more you resist the pressure of stress, the more harm it will cause-- until you cannot resist any more". -- Sid
"Resistance is futile". -- Whoknows
The cure for being stressed is...
- Screaming at anything that moves.
- Trying to get a high speed driving certificate.
- Putting a whoopie cushion in your boss' chair.
- Putting spiders in the toilet seat protector dispenser or the copier paper tray.
- Soak the next five people you meet with a water pistol.
- Plan tomorrows sick day.
- Disconnect the telephone and put it in the trash along with your pager.(see --> )
- Go on a "work diet" starting today-- cut back on work!
- Hang your socks at your door to ward off evil co-workers bringing work.
- Get lost for a while (see below).
- One by one tear pages from the phone book and make it into a paper airplane.
for a while!
The GLOP-1, properly placed at your work area, will convince anyone looking for you that you have other, more important problems to tend to than whatever they want to dump on you.
By thwarting the search for your whereabouts in its infancy, your options for stress escape are expanded and on returning you will be greeted with kindness and compassion instead of the customary "where were you" greeting received without using the GLOP-1.
For more information CLICK HERE!
For quick stress relief you might
NOT want to:
- Put your fist through a window.
- Set fire to your chair.
- Take off all your clothes.
Spray paint on your boss.
- Curse out a cop.
The "Hawaiian Good Luck Remedy" may be the cure! More...
- Stress produces grey hairs. WRONG-- Stress makes both your nose and buttocks hair grow!
- Stress is a major cause of impotence. WRONG-- Impotence is a major cause of stress.
- Stress builds up over time. WRONG-- Stress explodes instantly, it is the damage caused by stress that becomes progressively more noticeable over time..