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OddSpace Locator -- HOME : RAZZ : EXCUSE GENERATOR

Sick Call Excuse Generator

Sounds of Sickness

A very nice sound loop that you can play all day to prepare your co-workers for your forthcoming sick days!  This is surprisingly effective in getting people to feel sorry for you while you are suffering from your cold or flu...  If you have a sound card, it is a "must have".  DOWNLOADABLE VERSION is also available.

Palm-OS PDA
Sick Call Excuse Generator

Visit our PDA page and download the free excuse generator for your Palm-OS PDA! 

An absolute "must have"  for when you need to call in sick from the resort, atop the slopes, or from the sixth hole!.

We hope that our sick call generator is helpful to you in deciding the excuse for your forthcoming day off.

When calling in....

  • Practice your "sick-voice" (if applicable) before dialing the phone so you sound authentic.
     
  • Call before anyone has arrived at work so that you can leave your message with the supervisors voice-mail.
     
  • Make your sick call as short as possible. The longer your message, the more likely you will "slip up".
     
  • Be careful not to be sick on too many Fridays or Mondays in a row.
     
  • Your sickness will appear more authentic if it is done midweek and for more than one day at a time.
     
  • On your sick day, take your phone off the hook whenever you are away from home. A busy signal is more convincing than an endless ring, should work call you.

On returning to work, act lethargic for the first few hours.

BE CAREFUL TO NOT BRAG ABOUT THINGS YOU DID ON YOUR SICK DAY!
(that movie you saw, relatives visiting, etc).

You know you're calling in sick too much when...

  • Your coworkers are marking your attendance on a special calendar.
     
  • Your boss seems very concerned about your health.
     
  • Your boss asks you to create a detailed manual describing exactly how to do what you do at work.
     
  • The company assigns an "intern" to assist you (and this is unusual for someone in your position).
     
  • You are no longer given "important" tasks to perform.
     
  • Your coffee cup disappears, yet there are coffee rings on your desk.
     
  • Even your rubber ducky doesn't want to squeak for you any more. (and we all know how loyal rubber ducks are!)

Need more excuses?
Visit the Mother Of All Excuses page.

Evidence that you're ill...the glop-1 in action!

The GLOP-1, properly placed at your work area when you leave the day before your "mental health day", will remove any doubts as to your illness.

By showing clear evidence of illness,  on your return you will be greeted with kindness and compassion instead of the customary "raised eyebrow" greeting received otherwise.
For more information CLICK HERE!

Scare them away...
with a life-like skull!

Visit The Skull Closet!

Want to be Amused?
Visit SillyBuddies.com and have some great interactive fun!

Excuse Ball Keyring

Be prepared for people asking you all sorts of questions about work that wasn't completed during your illness.

The Excuse Ball Keyring will come to your aid and provide a convenient excuse for those times when you need some help.  Inexpensive insurance!
For more information CLICK HERE

Naughty Ned & Messie Bessie
FECALECTOMY
INSTRUCTIONS

 

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